Why did you click? I know nothing.
My compass of acceptable conversation is always trying to face north. North in this metaphor is the direction of political correctness. Every so often on this quest I get distracted and realise haven’t looked at my compass for a while. My metaphorical ship is sailing off course. I am telling a joke that might offend or making a controversial comment, uh oh. Sailing off course is adventurous though – and is interesting to others.
International women’s day has come and gone for another year. I dare not make any comment about that. That is a complete south facing topic, as a man I must fully support all statements made with a smile and a nod. Why is it on the 8th of March? Why the colour purple? I better ask google. Quite an interesting read. There is an international mens day too, give me a break. I mean – good. Sorry. Keep to the facts.
This is not an attack on IWD, it is just in the news, along with Coronavirus. Tread carefully here again. What is the right thing to say? From a north facing perspective – probably nothing. I am not a health professional, I have done very little research on the topic and I am getting most of my information from the likes of John Oliver and Trevor Noah.
The one thing I know is – I don’t know, I am a Coronavirus idiot. I am in no position to give anyone advice. Check out the World Health Organization if you need advice. Can I make a controversial comment about Coronavirus? Yes. Can I give advice? Yes. Should I? Nope. This is boring.
To add to the list of International Women’s Day and Coronavirus I know very little about the Democratic Party nomination in the good old US of A. In fact, I found myself judging the voters in Americas southern states for not voting for Bernie. I am a non-American with a mild interest in this presidential race and yet I manage to feel strongly enough to judge those who voted? I haven’t a clue. Asleep yet?
I have theories about money in elections and power corrupting. I am convinced that free health care, fighting climate change and removing student debt are good things. Who cares what I think if I am not extreme? I should research more on the topic before offering any more opinions. But unless I am extreme no one will care, so I make this piece more attractive. Extremes get votes now. Research takes time, who has the time?
Throughout this piece I am saying nothing, it is dull. No one cares if it makes sense or not, it is all north facing politeness. People love to be offended and are attracted to controversy. Have you seen this article? They feel the need to be outraged. This statement is of course opinion, no peer reviewed scientific studies carried out here. It is bordering on an extreme opinion, it is worthless, ignore it. Yawn.
I should stick to the facts. The fact is if I used a different headline and made a few controversial extreme statements more would read, more would be outraged and more would care. More clicks would make my life better won’t it? Boring doesn’t sell. Clickbait me.
Here are the headlines for my next few pieces, for the clicks.
- Why International Women’s Day should be banned – find out the reason here.
- Coronavirus can be cured by drinking broccoli infused tea – read more here.
- Bernie is a communist who has a picture of Lenin beside his bed – see the pictures here.
FIGHT LAZINESS 